Showing posts with label LOL. Show all posts
Showing posts with label LOL. Show all posts
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
LOL! - Have a very Merry Tampax :)
TAMPAX announced today that they will be taking the string off their tampons and replacing it with tinsel. This is for the Christmas period only! You have your choice of pine scent, merry mint, or cinnamon bun.
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Tweeting from the Womb...
This is pretty weird. I support technology, but this idea is just ridiculous. If you are going to "tweet", then why not actually "tweet" it?How much do these devices cost? The only good thing I can see is that instead of sitting in front of the computer saying "I am giving baby a bath", you are ACTUALLY doing that and transmitting it.Other than that, I think it is silly.
Unborn babies can now use Twitter
No you didn't read that wrong, unborn babies can now send Tweets from the womb. Creepy sounding isn't it?After you get past the initial "ick" factor of this, it's not that disturbing... actually it's quite interesting but, do you think Tweeting from the womb is taking social media too far? Tell us.Corey Menscher, an NYU student, has developed a suite of devices entitled "The Honeycomb", the first of which is "The Kickbee".
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BiUq-iMQy7E&feature=player_embedded
The Kickbee allows physically separated spouses to connect with one another by transmitting fragments of sensory experiences of prototypical parenting activities from various stages of babyhood. In order to pass long the information, The Kickbee utilizes the popular microblogging service Twitter as a platform to record and distribute “kicks” to fathers as mobile phone text messages, thanks to its publicly available Application Programming Interface (API).
In layman’s terms: Whenever your kiddo kicks... you get a Tweet about it.
On the technical side of things, a series of vibration sensors are attached to the belt longitudinally so their sensing areas can register the vibrations within the torso generated by a third-trimester baby. A microcontroller receives these signals, performs software filtering and processing, and transmits validated “kick” signals wirelessly to a custom Java application running on a personal computer.
Personally, back when my wife was pregnant (my son was born January 15, 2009) I would call my wife several times a day for general check-ins to see if the baby had been kicking much. I always enjoyed hearing about it, as it helped ease my worrisome mind, I guess.
I'm not saying that we would've used this product, but it would've been nice knowing when the baby was kicking.
As I mentioned above The Honeycomb also has two other stages, they are "The Burpbee" and "The Bathbee". Judging by the names you can probably tell what they're about.
The Burpbee transmits the warmth of a baby’s body on one parent’s shoulder to the other over a distance. It consists of two objects: a “transmitter” in the form of a burp cloth, and a “receiver” in the form of a men’s button-down shirt. The heater warms slowly, and after 30 seconds has reached its peak temperature of about 110º fahrenheitIn layman’s terms: Whenever your kiddo is burping... your shoulder area gets hot, as if you're the one doing the burping.
The Bathbee is an olfactory bathtime awareness device for a parent who is away from home. It consists of two objects: a “transmitter” in the form of a rubber ducky bath toy, and a “receiver” in the form of a rubber ducky-themed children’s lunchbox. When the bath toy is being actively played with in a bathtub, it transmits the smells of bathtime over a distance by filling the room with the scent of baby oil.
In layman’s terms: Whenever your kiddo is getting a bath... your room begins to smell of baby oil.
I can see the allure of The Kickbee... but the other two are kind of a stretch in my opinion.
What are your thoughts on The Kickbee and the other Honeycomb devices - Creepy or Innovative?
Unborn babies can now use Twitter
No you didn't read that wrong, unborn babies can now send Tweets from the womb. Creepy sounding isn't it?After you get past the initial "ick" factor of this, it's not that disturbing... actually it's quite interesting but, do you think Tweeting from the womb is taking social media too far? Tell us.Corey Menscher, an NYU student, has developed a suite of devices entitled "The Honeycomb", the first of which is "The Kickbee".
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BiUq-iMQy7E&feature=player_embedded
The Kickbee allows physically separated spouses to connect with one another by transmitting fragments of sensory experiences of prototypical parenting activities from various stages of babyhood. In order to pass long the information, The Kickbee utilizes the popular microblogging service Twitter as a platform to record and distribute “kicks” to fathers as mobile phone text messages, thanks to its publicly available Application Programming Interface (API).
In layman’s terms: Whenever your kiddo kicks... you get a Tweet about it.
On the technical side of things, a series of vibration sensors are attached to the belt longitudinally so their sensing areas can register the vibrations within the torso generated by a third-trimester baby. A microcontroller receives these signals, performs software filtering and processing, and transmits validated “kick” signals wirelessly to a custom Java application running on a personal computer.
Personally, back when my wife was pregnant (my son was born January 15, 2009) I would call my wife several times a day for general check-ins to see if the baby had been kicking much. I always enjoyed hearing about it, as it helped ease my worrisome mind, I guess.
I'm not saying that we would've used this product, but it would've been nice knowing when the baby was kicking.
As I mentioned above The Honeycomb also has two other stages, they are "The Burpbee" and "The Bathbee". Judging by the names you can probably tell what they're about.
The Burpbee transmits the warmth of a baby’s body on one parent’s shoulder to the other over a distance. It consists of two objects: a “transmitter” in the form of a burp cloth, and a “receiver” in the form of a men’s button-down shirt. The heater warms slowly, and after 30 seconds has reached its peak temperature of about 110º fahrenheitIn layman’s terms: Whenever your kiddo is burping... your shoulder area gets hot, as if you're the one doing the burping.
The Bathbee is an olfactory bathtime awareness device for a parent who is away from home. It consists of two objects: a “transmitter” in the form of a rubber ducky bath toy, and a “receiver” in the form of a rubber ducky-themed children’s lunchbox. When the bath toy is being actively played with in a bathtub, it transmits the smells of bathtime over a distance by filling the room with the scent of baby oil.
In layman’s terms: Whenever your kiddo is getting a bath... your room begins to smell of baby oil.
I can see the allure of The Kickbee... but the other two are kind of a stretch in my opinion.
What are your thoughts on The Kickbee and the other Honeycomb devices - Creepy or Innovative?
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Jeannie Toohey Announced as 2009 Mother of the Year
My friend Mel sent me the following video from CNNBC: "Jeannie Toohey Announced as 2009 Mother of the Year."
Watch it here
Watch it here
Monday, May 4, 2009
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Tax Preparation Tips
Tax Preparation Tips
Apr. 15 is rapidly approaching, and if you haven't filed your taxes yet, you'd better get started on them. Here are some tips to help you through this tough time of year:
When beginning your tax forms, make sure to do that thing where you make your calculator read "BOOBS" upside down right away so you don't get sidetracked later.
Pay your owed taxes in pennies. That will get you on the Yahoo! News front page, and it will most certainly make the IRS feel foolish.
Not putting that little dash through all of your sevens will result in a prison term of up to three years.
You will save significant time between now and the filing deadline if you complete all of your forms in a blind, sweaty panic 12 minutes before they are due.
If you are Yngwie Malmsteen, you can write off your subscription to Guitar World.
Screw over the IRS and save time and money by making less than $8,950 a year.
Here's a way to make taxes more fun and save money: Ask your friends for any old receipts they're not using, then make up stories for each one to tell the auditors.
Be courteous and include a sheet of scratch paper with your forms for the IRS to do math on.
Doing taxes can be a very long and arduous process, full of legal loopholes and pitfalls. Find someone else to file your client's forms.
It's not widely publicized, but now that all taxpayers are part owners of Merrill Lynch, you can use their bathrooms.
Not once does the Constitution of the United States of America mention an income tax. Keep screaming that when they take you to court for nonpayment of taxes.
Filling out your 1040EZ can be frustrating, but screaming at your wife, smashing a glass against the wall, and striking your child is never the right thing to do. You need form 4Y-1098 for that.
Apr. 15 is rapidly approaching, and if you haven't filed your taxes yet, you'd better get started on them. Here are some tips to help you through this tough time of year:
When beginning your tax forms, make sure to do that thing where you make your calculator read "BOOBS" upside down right away so you don't get sidetracked later.
Pay your owed taxes in pennies. That will get you on the Yahoo! News front page, and it will most certainly make the IRS feel foolish.
Not putting that little dash through all of your sevens will result in a prison term of up to three years.
You will save significant time between now and the filing deadline if you complete all of your forms in a blind, sweaty panic 12 minutes before they are due.
If you are Yngwie Malmsteen, you can write off your subscription to Guitar World.
Screw over the IRS and save time and money by making less than $8,950 a year.
Here's a way to make taxes more fun and save money: Ask your friends for any old receipts they're not using, then make up stories for each one to tell the auditors.
Be courteous and include a sheet of scratch paper with your forms for the IRS to do math on.
Doing taxes can be a very long and arduous process, full of legal loopholes and pitfalls. Find someone else to file your client's forms.
It's not widely publicized, but now that all taxpayers are part owners of Merrill Lynch, you can use their bathrooms.
Not once does the Constitution of the United States of America mention an income tax. Keep screaming that when they take you to court for nonpayment of taxes.
Filling out your 1040EZ can be frustrating, but screaming at your wife, smashing a glass against the wall, and striking your child is never the right thing to do. You need form 4Y-1098 for that.
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Mass-hole Barbies, coming soon to a town near you!
Mattel recently announced the release of limited-edition Barbie Dolls for the Massachusetts market:
" BACKBAY" Barbie"
This princess Barbie is sold only at The Prudential Mall. She comes with an
assortment of Kate Spade Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired foreign dog named Honey
and a cookie-cutter house. Available with or without tummy tuck and face
lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with the augmented version.
" EAST LONGMEADOW Barbie"
The modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Wind star Minivan
and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full-time occupation.
Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.
" WORCESTER Barbie (ALSO SOLD IN SPRINGFIELD ) "
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife,a
Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only
available after dark and must be paid for in cash (preferably small, untraceable
bills) ..unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are talking about.
" LONGMEADOW Barbie"
This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2.
Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card and country club membership. Also
available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to
afford any of them.
"WARE Barbie"
This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too
small, a NASCAR t-shirt and tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud
light and a Hank Williams Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's
butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag
bumper sticker absolutely free.
" DOWNTOWN BOSTON / NORTH END Barbie"
This collagen injected, rhino plastic Barbie wears a leopard print outfit
and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends. Percocet prescription available
as well as warehouse conversion condo.
"PALMER Barbie"
This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own
high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gutted Ken out her house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a
see-through halter-top. Also available with a mobile home.
" AMHERST/ NORTHAMPTON Barbie"
This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair,
arch-less feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her Willow . She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Barbies
and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free.
" HOLYOKE Barbie"
This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional accessories
include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his 1979 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.
" WILBRAHAM Barbie"
She's perfect in every way. We don't know where Ken is because he's always
out a-'huntin'.
" PROVINCETOWN Barbie/Ken"
This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply
adding or subtracting the multiple snap-on parts.
" BACKBAY" Barbie"
This princess Barbie is sold only at The Prudential Mall. She comes with an
assortment of Kate Spade Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired foreign dog named Honey
and a cookie-cutter house. Available with or without tummy tuck and face
lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with the augmented version.
" EAST LONGMEADOW Barbie"
The modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Wind star Minivan
and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full-time occupation.
Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.
" WORCESTER Barbie (ALSO SOLD IN SPRINGFIELD ) "
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife,a
Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only
available after dark and must be paid for in cash (preferably small, untraceable
bills) ..unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are talking about.
" LONGMEADOW Barbie"
This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2.
Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card and country club membership. Also
available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to
afford any of them.
"WARE Barbie"
This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too
small, a NASCAR t-shirt and tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud
light and a Hank Williams Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's
butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag
bumper sticker absolutely free.
" DOWNTOWN BOSTON / NORTH END Barbie"
This collagen injected, rhino plastic Barbie wears a leopard print outfit
and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends. Percocet prescription available
as well as warehouse conversion condo.
"PALMER Barbie"
This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own
high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gutted Ken out her house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a
see-through halter-top. Also available with a mobile home.
" AMHERST/ NORTHAMPTON Barbie"
This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair,
arch-less feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her Willow . She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Barbies
and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free.
" HOLYOKE Barbie"
This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional accessories
include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his 1979 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.
" WILBRAHAM Barbie"
She's perfect in every way. We don't know where Ken is because he's always
out a-'huntin'.
" PROVINCETOWN Barbie/Ken"
This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply
adding or subtracting the multiple snap-on parts.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Give Us This Day Our Daily CupCake...
In search of finding out more information about the G1 Google Android Cupcake Update...I found the cutest ever post. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!
The 2nd of two rumored cupcake release dates have passed and depression is setting in. It seems we must resort to prayer and so…
“In the name of the father/fabricator (HTC) and of the son/service (T-mobile) and of the holy ghost (Google)amen.
Our father (Android) who are in heaven (Online) hallowed be thy name, thy kingdom come on earth (in handsets) as it is in heaven (online). Give us this day our daily bread (cupcake) and forgive us our trepasses (being early adopters) as we forgive those who trespass against us (AT&T, Apple and Iphone users).
Lead us not into temptation (lusting for flash, video and stereo bluethooth), world (internet) without end amen.”
Let “Cupcake” fall from heaven like “Manna” to sustain us as we cross the desert looking for the holy land, peopled by other Android users.
The 2nd of two rumored cupcake release dates have passed and depression is setting in. It seems we must resort to prayer and so…
“In the name of the father/fabricator (HTC) and of the son/service (T-mobile) and of the holy ghost (Google)amen.
Our father (Android) who are in heaven (Online) hallowed be thy name, thy kingdom come on earth (in handsets) as it is in heaven (online). Give us this day our daily bread (cupcake) and forgive us our trepasses (being early adopters) as we forgive those who trespass against us (AT&T, Apple and Iphone users).
Lead us not into temptation (lusting for flash, video and stereo bluethooth), world (internet) without end amen.”
Let “Cupcake” fall from heaven like “Manna” to sustain us as we cross the desert looking for the holy land, peopled by other Android users.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
A Greasy Situation...
Tonight after Jacob got out of the shower and got dressed to come downstairs, his hair was all sticking up and "styled".
Guess what he did to get it that way?
He put VASOLINE in his hair!!!
I sat there for a minute not sure what to say, in awe, putting the words together, until it made sense. I kept thinking in my head, he didn't really do that, his hair is just wet. And as I am thinking this, I am noticing it in his hair.
I wasn't sure what to do and it was just about bedtime. I thought for a minute that I would deal with it in the morning but it's a greasy situation. I was thinking in my head, how am I going to get vasoline out of his hair?
So, I went online and good old Yahoo Answers came to my rescue. I looked over the answers and chose kja63's answer.
Her answer:
OMG! Get them out of the shower now. Water & oil do NOT mix.
Dry them off thoroughly. Then start with Baby Powder (absorbs the grease) and let them sit for a bit. Towel off any excess and reapply the Baby Powder again. Sit some more -- giving the talcum time to absorb the vaseline.
Then shower using a gentle shampoo and conditioner.
Monday, November 17, 2008
Things having kids teaches you:
Things having kids teaches you:
You probably do not want to know what that odor is.
You probably do not want to know what that odor is.
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